Just An Average Teenager

J.K. Rowling's Opinion of our Thin-Crazed World

2011-01-05T14:41:00.001-05:00

Well, for one, I ADORE J.K. Rowling..but I saw this article and I think she's spot-on. And this is an extremely important concept. (Though many of you will say wow what a hypocrite, posting an article about appreciating yourself and loving who you are. However this is a bit different: I may be a bit self-deprecating ["a bit?" you mumble] but I am not anorexic. And this is to all those girls out there who think they're fat. Who cares anyway?

J.K. ROWLING’S OPINION OF OUR THIN-CRAZED WORLD

“For Girls Only, Probably… Being thin. Probably not a subject that you ever expected to read about on this website, but my recent trip to London got me thinking…

It started in the car on the way to Leavesden film studios. I whiled away part of the journey reading a magazine that featured several glossy photographs of a very young woman who is either seriously ill or suffering from an eating disorder (which is, of course, the same thing); anyway, there is no other explanation for the shape of her body. She can talk about eating absolutely loads, being terribly busy and having the world’s fastest metabolism until her tongue drops off (hooray! Another couple of ounces gone!), but her concave stomach, protruding ribs and stick-like arms tell a different story. This girl needs help, but, the world being what it is, they’re sticking her on magazine covers instead. All this passed through my mind as I read the interview, then I threw the horrible thing aside.

But blow me down if the subject of girls and thinness didn’t crop up shortly after I got out of the car. I was talking to one of the actors and, somehow or other, we got onto the subject of a girl he knows (not any of the Potter actresses – somebody from his life beyond the films) who had been dubbed ‘fat’ by certain charming classmates. (Could they possibly be jealous that she knows the boy in question? Surely not!) ‘But,’ said the actor, in honest perplexity, ‘she is really not fat.’ ‘“Fat” is usually the first insult a girl throws at another girl when she wants to hurt her,’ I said; I could remember it happening when I was at school, and witnessing it among the teenagers I used to teach. Nevertheless, I could see that to him, a well-adjusted male, it was utterly bizarre behaviour, like yelling ‘thicko!’ at Stephen Hawking.

His bemusement at this everyday feature of female existence reminded me how strange and sick the ‘fat’ insult is. I mean, is ‘fat’ really the worst thing a human being can be? Is ‘fat’ worse than ‘vindictive’, ‘jealous’, ‘shallow’, ‘vain’, ‘boring’ or ‘cruel’? Not to me; but then, you might retort, what do I know about the pressure to be skinny? I’m not in the business of being judged on my looks, what with being a writer and earning my living by using my brain… I went to the British Book Awards that evening.

After the award ceremony I bumped into a woman I hadn’t seen for nearly three years. The first thing she said to me? ‘You’ve lost a lot of weight since the last time I saw you!’ ‘Well,’ I said, slightly nonplussed, ‘the last time you saw me I’d just had a baby.’ What I felt like saying was, ‘I’ve produced my third child and my sixth novel since I last saw you. Aren’t either of those things more important, more interesting, than my size?’ But no – my waist looked smaller! Forget the kid and the book: finally, something to celebrate! So the issue of size and women was (ha, ha) weighing on my mind as I flew home to Edinburgh the next day.

Once up in the air, I opened a newspaper and my eyes fell, immediately, on an article about the pop star Pink. Her latest single, ‘Stupid Girls’, is the antidote-anthem for everything I had been thinking about women and thinness. ‘Stupid Girls’ satirises the talking toothpicks held up to girls as role models: those celebrities whose greatest achievement is un-chipped nail polish, whose only aspiration seems to be getting photographed in a different outfit nine times a day, whose only function in the world appears to be supporting the trade in overpriced handbags and rat-sized dogs. Maybe all this seems funny, or trivial, but it’s really not. It’s about what girls want to be, what they’re told they should be, and how they feel about who they are. I’ve got two daughters who will have to make their way in this skinny-obsessed world, and it worries me, because I don’t want them to be empty-headed, self-obsessed, emaciated clones; I’d rather they were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind, opinionated, original, funny – a thousand things, before ‘thin’. And frankly, I’d rather they didn’t give a gust of stinking Chihuahua flatulence whether the woman standing next to them has fleshier knees than they do. Let my girls be Hermiones, rather than Pansy Parkinsons. Let them never be Stupid Girls. Rant over.”

J.K. Rowling

Happy New Year!

2011-01-02T15:17:00.000-05:00

Hey, guys! Sorry I haven't blogged seriously in a while.

Break has been blissful, and though I miss my friends and can't wait to get back to them, I'm sort of dreading school tomorrow...

Okay, so why don't y'all tell me (and then go tell Elena at her blog, which you will find a link to at the left, because she has a similar blog post but it's much more heartfelt and meaningful and worth your time [:) what your New Year's Resolutions are? Here are mine:

1. Eat healthier.
2. EXERCISE. (I want a Wii fit!! :P)
3. Try to build some gosh darn confidence.
4. Be more dedicated to my work...less procrastination, more LET'S GET THIS DONE AND DO IT RIGHT.
5. Say hello and call people by their names... I just never do that, it's a thing of mine.. I don't know.
6. Give more hugs. <3
7. Smile.
8. Just be happy... you can't let life get you down. It's too short.
9. Gain people's trust. I love giving advice and helping people..even just being people's shoulder to cry on. But not many people seem to trust me with that stuff, so I'd like that to happen, though I can't really force anyone to do that, obviously.
10. Live a little. Don't worry so much about the consequences.

Adding to number 9, I know I've sort of dropped the whole "advice" thing, but really, if anyone has anything they wanna get off their chest or get advice about, I'm here...and I'd never tell anyone about anything you say. [:

Okay. OH, and check out my youtube channel. I love to sing, and I've started recording songs and posting them to get feedback. You can comment there or here for songs I can sing next. :D

Click here -> http://www.youtube.com/user/stagegirl2013?feature=mhum#p/a/u/0/Nq_aS0waDrE

Recommend, por favor! :D

<3 madi

MOBILE BLOGGING FTW!

2010-12-21T15:01:00.002-05:00

Okay, it works. Guys, I can now send posts right from my phone...so if I die or something amazing happens...I'll send a picture. HOW COOL IS THAT?!

<3 madi

2010-12-21T15:00:00.001-05:00

testing..testing...1..2...3...

Not as pathetic!

2010-12-16T16:38:00.000-05:00

Ok so I actually looked accurately at where I was in the realm of page views...

Pageviews all time history

1,677

I must say, not too shabby! But I was looking at where people go from when they're viewing and such, and it's either my friend Elena's blog, my friend Jake's blog, or this website in the top three:
http://remroom.ru/

Click that. It's in a foreign language. I find that quite peculiar. And it's not like it was once either. Strange? I think so!

I love how the two main things people search on google and find this blog through are hitchhiker's guide quotes... what an honor. :D Anyways.

LOOK

United States

1,557

Russia

South Korea

Mexico

United Kingdom

Thailand

Venezuela

Canada

Brazil

Taiwan

I get page views from Russia, man!!! I know where the Brazil and Taiwan ones came from though. :P

So this boosted my blog confidence. End of story.

<3 madi

When I try to write an essay

2010-12-15T22:16:00.001-05:00

This is what happens when I try to write a serious essay about death and meaning.

Curse my father for his sense of humor when making fun of my cheesy, cliché endings... and this is what I wrote instead, just to spite him.

And now to write an actual closing sentence. Why can't I be a normal person? Because it's just too damn boring.

<3 madi

Cause this is totally what I do in my spare time.

2010-11-22T15:50:00.002-05:00

You wanna see pathetic?
This is what I do in my spare time.
I figure out new ways to make Word '11 for Mac cool.

For this first one I wasn't even thinking about posting it on my blog until after, so I was doing this purely for fun and for myself...pathetic? yes. insane? yes. out of the ordinary? nah.

....told you I was pathetic. I'M EASILY AMUSED, SUE ME.

<3madi

:O

2010-11-17T15:42:00.000-05:00

HOLY CRAP. JUST LOOKED AT MY PROFILE AND SAW SOMETHING EXTREMELY EXCITING AND PATHETIC AT THE SAME TIME.

I HAVE EXACTLY 42 PAGE VIEWINGS.

On the one hand:
That's kinda pathetic because if you think about it the majority of those were probably me, which means there are only like 3 people who actually LOOK at my blog. And they've each only looked at it like 6 times. And I've been here since May.

On the other hand:
HA! 42! I WIN! **dances**
(If you don't get this reference, shame. Go read Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy or I refuse to speak to you. Not really. But go.)

Now, you 3 people who look at my blog every once in a while, go read the less recent post cause this one's almost pointless and I put a whole lot more work into the other one.

GO.

<3madi

I love it when I find some new way to distract myself from life and homework, such as a blog, and immediately lose interest when I find a grammatical error.

2010-11-17T15:36:00.000-05:00

As you can see from the extensively long title, I was procrastinating (what a surprise! gasp!) today, and I was lookin' for something to catch my interest. I found this blog that took inspiration from my beloved Hyperbole and a Half (sound like anyone?) and began to read. I suppose I shouldn't have started at the earliest post. It was unfair. My earliest post is boring and stupid (as are the rest of them) and I wouldn't want anyone to base their opinion of my blog on my earliest post. BUT, I did. And I read the beginning... I was impressed so far! Interesting topic, whatever... but behold, an error. One of my pet peeves...
This person, who I assume is a very nice, respectable, blog-tastic young lady, replaced "lose" with "loose"... twice, actually... I couldn't bear to read on. And that sounds rude and horrible (probably because it's rude and horrible), but I just have a thing for grammar...

PEOPLE. LOOSE AND LOSE ARE TWO DIFFERENT WORDS.

If they weren't, there would probably be drastic communication consequences. And if I were funny and able to think of examples, I would put them here. But I'm not and I can't. So you're just gonna have to be creative.

UPDATE: I just went back to the post to give it a second chance. Found a few more typos, but the post had quite a good message. I'm going to take the things this person laid out and agree with them! Yay!
So it's about things she's learned about love. Obviously I've got a lot to learn... so I'mma teenagify this shniz.
(She put more stuffies in here that I'm going to replace with mine... comments under the numbered stuff. And I fixed the typos. This is actually a really good post. I'm just obnoxious.)

1. You can spend, minutes, hours, days, weeks or even months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could've, would've happened - or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move on.

Hah. GUILTY. Overanalyzing stuff is sooo not worth the time... most likely, it doesn't mean anything. (COUGH HYPOCRITE BLOGGER COUGH) So although sometimes it's good to pay attention to people, make sure you don't take what they're saying and twist it SO much that your brain explodes trying to figure out what this person could POSSIBLY have meant by such and such action/phrase/etc. Most likely, you WILL live not knowing every single thought in this person's head. I promise.

2. Don't be afraid to be alone.

I know this is good advice, but being alone is scary! Buuuuut she's right.......... you have to be independent. Because without a firm "me", there can never be a firm "us".

Look at me, bein' all logical.

3. Don't fall so quickly, you lose yourself in the process.

Okay, so I guess what she's saying here is make sure you keep who you are, even if you are devoted to someone else. Make sure you're (insert name here), not (insert name here)'s boy/girlfriend.

4. Don't be afraid to speak up if you have a problem with a relationship, and don't be afraid to end it.

Agh. See this is hard too. But yes yeeees, you are right Ms. Wise Blogger.
1. Speaking up
Si, make sure you speak up if you have a problem, but make sure it's not nagging. No one's gonna want someone who's trying to change their significant other (SO for the rest of this post and eternity) for their benefit...know when to stop.
2. Ending it
If you've done all you can, end it I suppose... and it'll be hard but do what ya gotta do? I have no idea, I don't have any experience with any of this! Haahaha I'm gonna abstain from commenting on this...

5. The end is of "us" is not the end of "me".

Sorta repetitive. But basically you'll move on, everything will get better, even though it feels like your life is gonna end right now, you will look back and say how, as my great friend Elena taught me, the pain has made you stronger.

6. It's ok if you move on slower than he does.

I mean at some point you have to let go I guess, but taking a while doesn't mean you're weak, it means you cared.

7. You WILL move on.

...said this :)

So yes, good post, I'm obnoxious, teenagers are dramatic, blah blah blah.

AAAANYWAY.
I was asked a LOOONG time ago to make a comic about test grades. I will. I promise. Eventually. Maybe.

...Maybe. Better go with maybe.

I love you all.

Sorry for disappearing off the face of the earth (as far as this blog is concerned) for the past month or so. Not that anyone cares.

<3madi

PS there's probably a few errors in here and I therefore am a hypocrite because I don't feel like proofreading.

Donations

2010-10-18T15:58:00.000-04:00

Hey, guys!

I'd like to let you know about a great cause that I support.

LLS's, or Leukemia and Lymphoma Society's, Light the Night walk is very soon, which means we need donations now more than ever.

Not only is it a great cause, but Stage Left Children's Theater is a firm supporter of LLS because one of our dear friends and alumni has recently been diagnosed. This gives us all the more reason to help all we can.

Please, if you can, donate here:
http://pages.lightthenight.org/wch/Rockland10/MDeming

A little donation of even $5 dollars will make all the difference.

Please donate whatever you can.

Thank you,
Madi

P.S., in case you ever need the link, it's now in the box to the left that says BLOGS AND SITES TO VISIT... and yes, it used to be labeled affiliates :P

Awesometicity Spectrum

2010-09-26T00:08:00.001-04:00

Here is what is described in the previous blog post:

<3 Madi

Oh right...

2010-09-25T23:51:00.000-04:00

Oh yes, I forgot to mention that if anyone ever wanted to ask me advice they still can. I just figured I'd try a new approach since no one ever asked ahaha, but yes.

Paintbrush has become a hobby of mine.

If you ever want me to attempt to draw you something (and believe me, I will try my best, but my best is still at the level of 'sucks quite a bit' on the awesometicity spectrum...) then I shall :P

That is all.

<3 Madi

Some randomness...

2010-09-25T23:48:00.000-04:00

Here's some randomness for ya...
This is a picture that my friend Liz drew for me.

Isn't it just lovely??? And here's one I drew...dedicated to my love, Elena... the one beautiful enough to be depicted as a fat bald man.

<3 Madi

SPIDER ATTACK!

2010-09-15T15:14:00.000-04:00

I had just gotten off my bus, approached my front door (this was about 15 minutes ago, mind you, so I am still a bit shaky from it), and unlocked it when I see, RIGHT next to my hand, THE BIGGEST, MOST SCARY DADDY LONG LEGS I HAD EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.

How it was:

How I saw it:

At this point I am hyperventilating. This spider has most definitely collected enough information about my DNA from being so close to my hand to report it to its army of well-trained army spiders that will come and get me when I least expect it.

I gathered up all the courage I could muster and picked up a large stick. I quickly brushed the spider off of the door and waited timidly while it crawled far enough away for me to be able to dash in and slam the door on it. Really, my internal monologue went something like this:

"SPIDER!!! SPIDERSPIDERSPPPPPPPPPIIIIIIIIIDDDDDEEEEEEERRRRR! HUGE. HUMONGOUS. GIGANTIC SPIDER. SCARY EVIL ARMY TRAINED DEATH SPIDER. AHHHHHH! I HAVE TO PEE. I HAVE TO PEE AND I HAVE TO GET INTO THE DOOR NOW. NOOOOOW. STICK. STICK. BIG STICK. WAHHHHHH KILLER SPIDER GONNA EAT ME IF I TOUCH IT. IT'S GONNA EAT ME IT'S GONNA EAAAT MEEEE. STICK. *picks up stick.* BRUUUSH BRUSH BRUSH GO SPIDER GOOOO! GOOD SPIDER.....GOOD SPIDER....GO...CRAWL...DIE...OKAY IT'S GONE. RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!" **slams door.** "Holy crap. That spider was extremely Brobdingnagian." ...maybe I didn't actually think that last part. It was probably actually something like, "Holy crap, that spider was freaking humongous."

By the way, Brobdingnagian is a word. Look it up.

2010-09-14T21:00:00.001-04:00

I just wanted to highlight something amazing that has been placed over yonder -->

MY FRIEND BRIAN MADE IT FOR ME. IT MAKES ME FEEL QUITE SPECIAL AND HAPPY INSIDE.
Look how talented he is!!! Thanks, Brian :DDDD

School

2010-09-13T19:56:00.000-04:00

You guys know the feeling you get when you've just about had enough of summer boredom and you're excited for a new year? (Maybe that's just me.... o_O) And then on the first day you get that rush of excitement and adrenaline? Sorta like this:

Then, by the second or third day, the concept of THINKING and WORKING starts to catch up with you, like this....

And finally, about two or three weeks in, when the work is piled so high you can't even see where it stops anymore, you start to feel (and most likely even LOOK) like this:

Attacked!

2010-09-11T21:56:00.000-04:00

Okay, so today my friends and I went for a walk to my old elementary school to take a break from homework. (Yeah, we're nerds.) As we were bringing out our inner elementary school children and sliding down the slide, a group of scary-looking people began to approach us. I was quite intimidated by their black clothing and baggy jeans, and as they got closer we realized that they were seventh graders. Since we were ninth graders, it shouldn't have been that big of a deal, right? We should be able to handle a bunch of seventh grade hooligans! We were so very wrong.

They recognized one of my friends, Fishy42, as someone from their bus, and immediately began shouting his name and attempting to hug him, which, apparently, in perverted seventh grade language, means something close to molesting. As we started to walk back to my house, they followed. My first thought was, "WHAT IF THEY FOLLOW ME ALL THE WAY TO MY HOUSE AND THEY FIND OUT WHERE I LIVE AND THEY COME IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND RAPE ME AND KILL ME IN MY SLEEP?!" As you could guess, I tried to be sneaky and pretend like my house was on some random side street near my school. As we turned, one of them shouted, "THAT'S NOT WHERE YOU LIVE!"

"What?!" I replied.
"That's not where you live."
"How do YOU know?!"
"You live next to Vinny."

My heart sank as realization hit me: Vinny is my neighbor's name.

CREEPYSTALKERMIDDLESCHOOLERS!

Scared out of my mind by these little seventh grade boys who not only were following us and throwing acorns and crab apples (YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH THOSE LITTLE VERSIONS OF DELICIOUS FRUITS HURT!), but also knew where I lived, we continued onto a few more random side streets. Eventually they got bored and stopped following us, but I was pretty sure I was going to be raped by a seventh grade boy and be scarred by the sight of a playground slide for the rest of my life.

So, in conclusion, I change my picture that is supposed to portray middle school in the previous blog post to this:

Except there were like six of them. Hooligans.

2010-09-11T15:56:00.000-04:00

Okay, so I recently became a freshman in high school, and it is juuuust a biiiiit different than middle school.

FIRST of all, it's COMPLICATED. Like really, at least in middle school all the wings were the same. SQUARES. SIMPLE GEOMETRIC FIGURES. In high school, it's all "I'MMA BE ALL WEIRD AND CONFUSE YOU! MWAHHH!" So the numbers are like, "Room #1... Room # 45,000... Room # 7,000,528... Room # 7 and a half...."

Not to mention the difference in the size of the students. In eighth grade you can be like "I'M BIGGAH THAN THE SIXTH GRADAHS!"

But now it's all "WHHAAAAA THEY'RE HUUUUGE!"

Lame Comebacks

2010-09-11T01:01:00.000-04:00

You know, I don't know about you guys, but I ALWAYS find myself saying the LAMEST comebacks to things that don't necessarily warrant comebacks at all.

And they usually involve "your face."

And they usually make absolutely no sense.

But seriously, why do I continue to say these things? Not only are they nonsensical, but it's not like if I keep practicing it it'll come to be any use in a real life situation.

Hmm...?

2010-08-25T01:06:00.000-04:00

Okay, so I posted my short story here, and it really sucked, right?
Yeah.
So I edited it a little.
It still sucks.
But it sucks a little less.
Here.

MY CALEB
I walked into the school for the first time; my home away from home for the next four years. Dying to make a good impression yet trying not to care what people think, I made an effort to look nonchalant. People looked me up and down as I walked through the halls. I was dressed all in black and my dark curls billowed down to my shoulders. I fiddled with the keychain hanging from my old, dark purple backpack that had followed me through school for the past 3 years, tucked a curl behind my ear, and continued walking. My eyes perused my unfamiliar surroundings.
Smaller but much more complicated than my old school, Agerville High was a maze of long hallways and classrooms piled high with intimidating textbooks. I passed a group of gossiping girls, primping in the small magnetic mirrors set carefully in their bedazzled lockers. Butterflies tickled my stomach as I walked to the right side of the hallway and searched my backpack for my schedule. When I found the crumpled piece of paper in a side pocket, I looked up and was greeted with the same winning smile I saw the last day of eighth grade.
“Claire!” he shouted as he rushed through the crowded hallway.
“Hey, Caleb!” While I noticed Caleb Scott’s light brown hair gelled up into spikes in the front, much different from the longish locks that hung beside his face three months ago, I also realized that instead of hugging his shoulders I was now hugging something closer to midway down his back. I stepped back and looked him up and down.
“You’re taller!”
“That’s what puberty will do to you,” he said with a smirk.
My heart beat faster, but I didn’t let it show. His height and hair may have changed, but what hadn’t were his hypnotizing blue eyes and bright smile that made my stomach turn.
“Of course,” I teased, “now I don’t have to bend down when I hug you!”
“Now, let’s not get too cocky,” he said defensively.
“Don’t pretend like you don’t remember!” I said laughing. “Last I knew I was 5’ 6” and you were 5’ 5”!”
“Well, I am pleased to inform you that I am now a whopping 5’ 8”… and still growing!” he said with a triumphant smile. He stood up straighter and lifted his chest. “And I’m filling out. Did you notice?”
I had.
I saw another figure walking towards us.
“Sammy!”
“Claire! Caleb!” Samantha Bennett ran towards us with a huge grin on her face. She was excited to see both of us⎯the truth of the matter was that we’d had a sleepover two nights ago, but two days was forever when it came to Sammy and me, even if we did talk endlessly online and through text messages.
“Sammy!” shouted Caleb. He’d been the one at sleep-away camp for the summer… something I’d been quite upset about. “Sammy girl, how was your summer?”
“It was pretty good; pretty boring without you!”
“Oh, I see, I’m pretty boring?” I said with a smile, eyebrows raised and hands on hips.
“Well maybe if you hadn’t insisted on writing to this one all summer...” she said, gesturing to Caleb.
“Oh, right… sorry about that, Claire. I wanted to write you back, but I kept forgetting…”
My heart sank. I bet he spent plenty of time writing back to Becky. Becky was a blonde beauty… perfect in every way, and the luckiest girl in the world as far as I was concerned. I changed the subject.
“Hey!” I said to Sammy with a laugh and a pasted-on smile. Sometimes years of acting classes come in handy. “I spent lots of time with you!”
“Yeah, yeah,” she teased as we strolled off to first period. We had been lucky enough to have almost identical schedules two years in a row… maybe if he wasn’t in so many of my classes I would have paid more attention.

------------------------------------------------------------------

I got off the bus and searched through my backpack for my key. After unlocking the door, hanging up my black sweater, and greeting my cat with a quick pat, I walked into the kitchen.
“Mom?” I shouted. No answer. “Mom…”
I walked toward the counter where there was a slip of carelessly ripped paper with a few words scrawled on it:
At work. Dinner in microwave. Love you.
Of course. Audrey Jameson worked three jobs: one as a veterinarian’s assistant at the Greene County Animal Hospital, one as a waitress at the Hogan’s nearby, and one as a tutor for middle and high school students. These kept her busy most of the time. Not getting to see her much bothered me more when I was younger, and when I complained she used to say, “If you can grow a money tree, Claire, then you can get me as many days off from work as you please.”

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Agerville, New York is the definition of a small town. I know that New York is thought of as a state full of bustling big cities, but believe it or not, upstate is pretty rural. Cows, farms, you name it… if it’s a small-town stereotype, we have it. Minus the southern accents, of course. Even when I turned 15, I still didn’t get much privacy from my neighbors. Not five minutes after I read the note, Alma Peterson, my elderly neighbor, knocked on the door. Dressed in a neat, floral dress covered by a bleached white apron, Alma was equipped with a sweet-smelling tray covered with aluminum foil, and a big smile.
“Oh, Claire, how beautiful you look! If only you would add some color to that outfit…” she said as she hurried through the door and put the tray on the counter.
“Hi, Alma.” I said. “What’s that?”
“I made you a batch of my homemade cinnamon sugar cookies! I knew your mom would be working late tonight, so I thought I’d stop by and give you something to munch on… and maybe a little company.” She removed the foil from the pan. “Here, try one,” she squealed as she forced the cookie towards my mouth.
“Thanks Alma, but I’ll pass,” I said, gently pushing her hand back. “I haven’t had dinner yet,” I lied, “...and I have to get started on my homework.” My eyes flickered down to the table. I was a horrible liar.
“Homework? On the first day of school? Oh, alright…” she said, walking away and sounding hurt. “Enjoy them…” and she closed the door quietly behind her.
I felt bad for pushing her away, but how would I ever get to be alone if I didn’t find a way to get her out of the house? I sighed and sat down at the table. I took one of the cookies and quickly discarded it after discovering that it tasted similar to cardboard sprinkled with cinnamon. As I rested my head in my hands, I thought.
Why can’t you be nice? You don’t deserve to be surrounded by such loving people… you never give anything back. No wonder Caleb doesn’t see anything in you. He deserves better.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I was in my room alone, lying on my bed, thinking. I didn’t think often, because I didn’t like my thoughts… I thought about Caleb, how I will never have a chance, how maybe I should just magically turn into Becky, how I’m too selfish, how my mom is never here, how I should be doing something with my life, how I’m not pretty enough, how I’m not good enough. I broke down… but no one heard me cry.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning I called Sammy. I paced my room as the phone rang.
“Hello?”
“Sammy!”
“Oh, hey, Claire. What’s up?”
“...I can’t do it anymore.”
“Do what?”
“How much longer am I supposed to sit here waiting for him… I wrote him letters all summer, and what do I get back? ‘Thanks for all the letters, Claire. See you in September.’” I curled up on my bed and hugged my pillow to my chest.
“I know, Claire. I know. But you can’t give up… I see the way you look at him. It makes my stomach turn. It’s not something that you can control, and it’s not something that you can just let go… hang in there.”
I threw my pillow to the floor. “He’ll never look at me that way… am I ever going to be happy?”
“Of course you will, Claire. Some day you’re going to find someone amazing who loves you for everything you are, and when you do I’ll get to say ‘I told you so.’”
I rolled my eyes. “Easy for you to say… you’re happy. You have Ben.”
“Claire, I promise you, one day⎯”
“One day, I’ll get everything I ever wanted. One day, I’ll be happy. One day, one day, one day… Sammy, no matter how many times you say that, it’s not true!” I screamed.
There was silence.
My face was hot.
“I’m sorry,” she said, sounding a bit hurt. “Calm down. Go take your mind off it.”
I hung up.
Calm down? Calm down. You try to calm down when your life is falling apart. I took a deep breath. On the other side of my small room on my bedside table lay my iPod. I put on my favorite song.

---------------------------------------------------------------

School was the same as always. I saw Caleb and my heart skipped a beat. We walked together to first period, and when he was speaking to me I was more absorbing the sound of his voice than hearing his endless chatter.
“Claire, is something wrong?”
Everything is wrong.
“Oh, no, of course not. Go on.”
He kept talking, I kept listening. I kept dreaming of him and he kept dreaming of her. It was normal, but it was torture, and it would never change. My best friend… the one who breaks my heart and yet keeps it alive… my Caleb.

Eh. This is a suckish place to spend your internet time.

2010-08-25T00:42:00.000-04:00

I was just reading over my old posts from the first month of blogging, and I decided that they were the most suckish thing that I've ever read in my entire life, and that I was really stupid (and still am). So anyway, obviously being an advice blog failed. Miserably. Cause I suck. Soooo, this is officially just a blog.

Just.

Blog.

...it's a really suckish place for you to be spending your time.

Why are you even here?

Okay anyways, I'll just post every once in a while if I feel the need to express an opinion about something that no one really wants to hear my opinion about, or maybe to just blabber on about nonsense that no one cares about...

<3madi

Looook!!! :D

2010-08-25T00:02:00.000-04:00

I'm just a little excited right now (and by just a little excited I mean jumping for joy) because my friend and affiliate, Aaron from Ramblings of a Writer, made me THEEEE coolest thing....it's the title of my blog...but pretty-ified. LOOK.

HOW AMAZING IS THAT!?!?!??!!??!

LOOK AT THE COLORS...

AND THE COOL LOOKING THINGY....

AND THE SPARKLES...

shiiiiiiiiiiiny.

That is all.

<3 madi

New stuff and THE AWESOMEST BLOG IN THE WORLD

2010-08-09T15:58:00.001-04:00

Heyylooooo.

I haven't posted in a while.

This is a fact.

However, I DID edit my blog the slightest bit.

If you'll look to your left, *points to the left of the screen*, you'll notice that there is now a tab that reads AFFILIATES. No, you're not hallucinating, I added a gadget! *gasp*
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This means that I read and comment on all these blogs and they at least read mine...if they don't comment... so yeah! If you're reading this right now and you're all "WAIT I HAVE A BLOG AND I READ/COMMENT/READ AND COMMENT ON YOURS AND I'M NOT ON THAT LIST....WHAT IS THIS!?" then you should immediately comment on this post and be all "YO, DUDE, MAKE ME YOUR AFFILIATE." and I'll be all "YO, DUDE, NO PROBLEMO."

Yeah.

NOOOW, if you'll look to your RIGHT, *points to the right side of the screen*, you'll see a tab that says BLOGS I LOVE A LOT (BUT DON'T COMMENT ON OR ANYTHING.) Under this title is one blog and only one. It is called HYPERBOLE AND A HALF.
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WARNINGWARNINGWARNINGWARNINGWARNINGWARNING:
I AM ABOUT TO WRITE A VERY LONG PIECE ABOUT MY NEWFOUND LOVE. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO NAVIGATE AWAY FROM THE PAGE, NOW WOULD BE THE TIME...HOWEVER, JUST KNOW THAT YOU WILL FOREVER BE A PART OF THE SLIGHTLY SADDER POPULATION OF THE WORLD WHO HAS NOT VISITED THIS BLOG.

Alright. NOW. About this HYPERBOLE AND A HALF business...
Allie Brosh, along with Natalie Tran and a person I've actually MET and actually knows of my EXISTENCE on this world, is someone who I love, and someone who can make me laugh at any point during my lonely and pitiful existence.
Her wonderful and INGENIOUS blog was recommended to me by a dear friend of mine, and once I found it, I can honestly say that I spent basically 12+ hours STRAIGHT reading through all the posts and asking myself HOW I could POSSIBLY have lived without this for the past fourteen years of my life.
You may have seen my enthusiastic (to say the least) post on facebook last night:

Remove
Madison Emma OH. MY. GOODNESS...... LIZ INTRODUCED ME TO THE BEST BLOGGER IN THE WORLD TODAY. NO OFFENSE TO ANY OF MY FRIENDS WHO BLOG, I BLOG TOO, BUT ALKDSJFLKASDJF. NOT ONLY IS SHE HILARIOUS BUT Krish Lingala, YOU WOULD LOVE HER BECAUSE SHE REMINDS ME OF NAT AND ALSO BECAUSE SHE USED SEVERAL PHRASES THAT ARE IN YOUR EVERYDAY VOCABULARY AND Jake Gogats and Krista Ramiah, HER FAVORITE BOOK IS HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE. WHAT MORE COULD YOU ASK OF A PERSON?!?!??! AHHHH. HERE. LOOK. NOW.
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/

Hyperbole and a Half
hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com

15 hours ago · Comment · · Share

Some of you may say, "Oh COME ON, how awesome could something be? I'm sure it's just the fact that you have nothing better to do with your life than sit around on the computer looking at other people's blogs like a stalker all day that makes you love this one so much."
This may be true, BUT I don't know HOW, after reading her hilarious posts, you could NOT agree that her awesome epic hilarious ninja-of-humor-ness surpasses anything I have ever witnessed before.
This is what it looks like:
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In conclusion, you should right at this moment navigate AWAY from this page (if you haven't done so already... because I don't blame you, as awesome as Allie is, maybe she's not worth the torture of reading my writing, but just click the link on the side first! You won't regret it!) and go visit her blog IMMEDIATELY!

...

WHY AREN'T YOU GONE YET?!??!? GO!

MY CALEB

2010-07-12T20:08:00.000-04:00

   MY CALEB
I walked into the school for the first time; my home for the next four years. Dying to make a good impression, yet trying not to care what people think, I made an effort to look nonchalant. People looked me up and down as I walked down the halls. I was dressed all in black and my dark curls billowed down to my shoulders. A few feet away a group of sophomore girls glanced at me and giggled. I tucked a curl behind my ear and kept walking. Just ignore it, I thought. Don’t let it get to you…
Half way to first period I was greeted with the same winning smile I saw the last day of eighth grade.
“Claire!” he shouted.
“Hey, Caleb!” Caleb Scott. My best friend… guy friend, that is. While I noticed his light brown hair gelled up into spikes in the front, a different haircut than he had three months ago, we walked over and hugged each other. I realized that instead of hugging his shoulders I was now hugging something closer to midway down his back.
“You’re taller!”
“That’s what puberty will do to you,” he said with a smirk.
My heart beat faster, but I didn’t let it show. His height and hair may have changed, but what hadn’t were his hypnotizing blue eyes and bright smile that made my stomach turn.
“Of course,” I laughed, “now I don’t have to bend down when I hug you!”
“Now let’s not get too cocky...” he said defensively.
“Don’t pretend like you don’t remember!” I said laughing. “Last I knew I was 5’ 6” and you were 5’ 5’, sir.”
“Well, I am pleased to inform you that I am now a whopping 5’ 8”… and still growing!” he said with a triumphant smile. He stood up straighter and lifted his chest. “AND I’m filling out. Did you notice?”
Yes.
I saw another figure walking towards us.
“Sammy!”
“Claire! Caleb!” Samantha Bennett, my best girl friend, ran towards us with a huge grin on her face. She was excited to see both of us⎯the truth of the matter was that we’d had a sleepover two nights ago, but two days was forever when it came to Sammy and me.
“Sammy!” shouted Caleb. He’d been the one at sleepaway camp for the summer… something I’d been quite upset about. “Sammy girl, how was your summer?!”
“It was pretty good, pretty boring without you!”
“Oh, I see, I’m pretty boring?” I said with a teasing smile.
“Well maybe if you hadn’t insisted on writing to this one all summer,” she said, gesturing to Caleb.
“Oh, right… sorry about that, Claire. I spent a lot of time writing to Becky… I wanted to write you back, but I kept forgetting…”
My heart sank. Becky… why Becky? What does she have that I don’t have? I changed the subject.
“Hey!” I said to Sammy with a laugh, “I spent lots of time with you!”
And, hitting both of them with my assignment pad as they laughed at me, we went off to first period. We had been lucky enough to have almost identical schedules two years in a row… maybe if he wasn’t in so many of my classes I would have paid more attention.

   -------------------------------------------------------------------

   I got off the bus and searched through my backpack for my key. After unlocking the door, hanging up my black sweater, and greeting my cat with a quick pat, I walked into the kitchen.
“Mom?” I shouted. No answer. “Mom…”
I walked toward the counter where there was a slip of carelessly ripped paper with a few words scrawled on it:

   At work. Dinner in microwave. Love you.

Of course. Audrey Jameson worked three jobs: one as a veterinarian’s assistant at the Greene County Animal Hospital, one as a waitress at the Hogan’s nearby, and one as a tutor for middle and high school students. These kept her busy most of the time. Not getting to see her much bothered me more when I was younger, and when I complained she used to say, “If you can grow a money tree, Claire, then you can get me as many days off from work as you please.”

   -----------------------------------------------------------------

   Agerville, New York is the definition of a small town. I know that New York is thought of as a state full of bustling big cities, but believe it or not, upstate is pretty rural. We have cows, farms, everyone knows who everyone is... every small town stereotype you can think of, we have… minus the southern accents. So, as you can imagine, going into my house alone did not last very long. Even when I turned 15, I still didn’t get much privacy from my neighbors. Not five minutes after I read the note, Alma Peterson, my elderly neighbor, knocked on the door.
“Oh, Claire, how beautiful you look! If only you would add some color to that outfit…” she said as she hurried through the door and put a pan of something smelling of cinnamon on the counter.
“Hi, Alma.” I said. “What’s that?”
“I made you a batch of my homemade cinnamon sugar cookies! I knew your mom would be working late tonight so I thought I’d stop by and give you something to cheer you up.” She removed the foil from the pan. “Here, try one⎯”
“Er, thanks Alma, but I’ll pass. I haven’t had dinner yet and I have to get started on my homework.” The old I’m-so-interested-in-getting-my-grades-up excuse.
“Homework? On the first day of school? Oh, alright…” she said, walking away and sounding hurt. “Enjoy them…” and she closed the door quietly behind her.
I felt bad for pushing her away, but if I didn’t she would hang around here all the time… and how would I ever get to be alone? I sighed. Maybe if you weren’t so selfish you could be nice to people…

   --------------------------------------------------------------------

   I was in my room alone, lying on my bed, thinking. Sometimes I thought about my dad… who was he, anyway? You don’t remember much from when you’re 3… All I knew was that his name was Gale. I know, strange name for a guy… appropriate, though, seeing as it means “The Stranger”. I didn’t think often, because I didn’t like my thoughts… I thought about Caleb, how I will never have a chance, how maybe I should just magically turn into Becky, how I’m too selfish, how my mom is never here, how I should be doing something with my life, how I’m not pretty enough, how I’m not good enough. I broke down… but no one heard me cry.

   --------------------------------------------------------------------

   The next morning I called Sammy. I would have done it the night before, but she goes to sleep early. I paced my room as the phone rang.
“Hello?”
“Sammy!”
“Oh, hey, Claire. What’s up?”
“...I can’t do it anymore.”
“Claire…”
“I don’t know what to do! How much longer am I supposed to sit here waiting for him… I wrote him letters all summer, and what do I get back? ‘Thanks for all the letters, Claire. See you in September.’”
“I know, Claire. I know. But you can’t give up… I see the way you look at him. It makes my stomach turn. It’s not something that you can control, and it’s not something that you can just let go… hang in there.”
“He’ll never look at me that way… and it’s not just that. My mom… she’s just not here. Ever.”
“Claire, she’s just trying to support you…”
“Well maybe she should be supporting me here, at home! I can’t go through this alone. I have no one to talk to!”
“I’m here…”
“In person, Sammy.”
“Oh, well⎯”
“And my dad… where is he? What’s he doing? What did I do wrong to make him leave?”
“I know these questions have been haunting you, Claire, but it’s not your fault.”
“Sammy, no matter how many times you say that, it’s not true!” I screamed.
There was silence.
“I’m sorry,” she said, sounding a bit hurt. “Calm down. Go take your mind off it.”
I hung up.
Calm down? Calm down. You try to calm down when your life is falling apart. I took a deep breath. On the other side of my small room on my bedside table lay my iPod. I put on Taylor Swift.

   ------------------------------------------------------------------------

   I had never thought myself a good singer. I’d never really tried before. I mean, sure, I sang along to all the Disney songs when I was little, but no one ever said, “Wow, honey, that’s great!” or “Do you want to be a singer?” or anything like that. I took piano lessons from when I was six to when I was eleven, but I still didn’t consider myself any good. I had never before thought of writing songs. If Taylor can do it, why can’t I? I thought. I sat down in front of the piano and played what came to mind. A few chords, a few melody notes, and I couldn’t stop. I suddenly wasn’t thinking about my mom, my dad, or even Caleb… all I could think of were the sudden lyrics that I hastened to write down. All I could hear was the sound of the beautiful chords that left miraculously from the piano. All I could feel was the cold of the keys under my fingers and my voice beginning to loosen up after all these years. It was the best feeling in the world… I never wanted it to end.

   --------------------------------------------------------------------------

   School was the same as always. I saw Caleb and my heart skipped a beat. We walked together to first period, and when he was speaking to me I was more absorbing the sound of his voice than hearing his endless chatter.
“Claire, is something wrong?”
Everything is wrong.
“Oh, no, of course not. Go on.”
He kept talking, I kept listening. I kept dreaming of him and he kept dreaming of her. It was normal, but it was torture, and it would never change. I went home to write a new song about her… about him… about everything. My best friend… the one who breaks my heart and yet keeps it alive… my Caleb.

Remember, be brutal!

<3madi

New topics!

2010-07-11T22:55:00.000-04:00

Come on, people, give me some ideas here!

Well, one of my friends has been posting his novel up on his blog for people to comment on...

Unless there are other suggestions, which I would gladly take, I can go forth and post a short story I wrote up here.

It's not... good... but it's a start, I suppose, and people can be brutal... you know, this sucks, don't quit your day job, things to that effect. Practice makes perfect, right?

Alrighty... well starting in a few days I'll post it in parts, if that's what y'all would enjoy, if I don't get any other suggestions.

Hope you all are having a nice summer!

<3madi

Don't Give Up

2010-07-05T23:18:00.000-04:00

My... I haven't posted in a very long time... sorry!

Well, here's a new one for ya!

I just want to say to all those "hopeless" cases out there, don't give up hope.
There will be a time where everything starts to go... right. And that may sound impossible... believe me, I've been there. But while you sit there jealous of your friends (don't be ashamed, it comes with the package... you can be jealous and supportive at the same time, been there too ;) ) just think that someday, that will be you. Don't give up hope. Because you will find someone someday that loves you for your flaws, and that person will make you happy. And I KNOW that someone telling you this does nothing. "Why can't it happen NOW?" you're thinking. Or, "how do you know?" Or even, "easy for you to say."
I've thought all those things! But I'm telling you... when you least expect it, good things will happen. And then you will come back to this blog post and think, "Wow, Madi, you were right." And I will think "I told you so."

<3madi

Dancing = -_-

2010-06-10T18:47:00.000-04:00

My, oh, my... I haven't posted in a while, have I?

I'll have to catch up on that :-)

Well, because there haven't been any other advice posts, I will just tell you a bit about what's going on in my life... also, if there are any suggestions about things you would like me to discuss, post them here. :)

Alrighty. Well, at my school, if you are in ninth grade honors Global History in eighth grade, then you are required to participate in National History Day, a competition in which students create projects (Documentaries, which is what I'm doing, Exhibits, Research papers, Websites, etc.) under the selected theme (this year it's Innovations in History: Impact and Change) and compete in a regional, state, and national competition. First and second place in each category move on to the States after Regionals, and then first and second after that move on to Nationals.

Lucky for us, my friends (Thanks For All the Fish42, Krish, and my group members Shelby and Taylor, as well as Miskat and Hannah) and I are moving on to Nationals, which are this weekend.

I am excited... but apparently there's a dance, and as you can see from my choice of titles, dances aren't exactly "my thing" ...

Heehee.

Well, that's all for now... don't forget to post ideas for new topics of discussion!!! :D

<3 madi

Some More Advice (#3)

2010-06-02T16:41:00.000-04:00

Well, all of your advice has been extremely useful :) I think that I am ready to kiss her, and take the next level in our relationship! However, there is just one more problem, (I'm sorry if I'm stressing you out by telling you about all the problems in my relationship and then asking for advice about it) whenever we are alone, or attempting to be alone, her ex boyfriend is always around. Not only does his presence bother me when we are together, but the fact that he hugs her and puts his arm around her occasionally annoys me to the extent that there is a risk I might implode!!! I'm soooooo stressed out about this because I will be gone for a week leaving her alone with him, and I really don't want her to cheat on me, or attempt to cheat on me, AGAIN... Your advice would be greatly appreciated :)

Alrighty, here we go... hope I'm still useful!! Oh, by the way, you're not stressing me out, I'm more than happy to help :)

First of all, you shouldn't have to feel threatened by her ex-boyfriend. If that is happening, you need to talk to both him and her about it. It may seem hard or even impossible, but, as some may say, the "pants" in the relationship can't belong to just one person. Each person must have a say in what goes on, and you can't let yourself be stepped on like you are. If your girlfriend is flirting with her ex-boyfriend, you need to tell her that you don't like it and that she needs to stop. If she has a problem with it, then maybe this isn't the healthiest relationship. You should be devoted to her and she should be devoted to you.

Also, it seems she has cheated on you before...? If that is the case, although it's not my business to tell you what to do, maybe this relationship isn't the healthiest or best one for you to be involved in. I can tell that you are a great person, and you don't deserve that kind of stress or frustration. I can also tell that you are truly devoted to her, but if she's not devoted to you the same way then it isn't a healthy relationship.

You should not have to worry about her cheating on you. If you don't have faith that your girlfriend is faithful, again, it isn't a healthy relationship. You need to talk to her about it. Talk to her about feeling threatened by her ex, talk to her about being faithful while you're gone. I know that it might be unpleasant, but it's very important. Also, a great person like you must have great friends who have your back, so if anything happens while you're gone that they see, they'll tell you. If that happens, you may need to break it off. It will be hard, but there are plenty of fish in the sea, and this particular one just isn't good enough for you.

I also want to tell you that you should NEVER feel that it's your fault. It's not your fault. You are a wonderful person, I can just tell, and the way she acts is HER problem, not yours.

So, to sum it all up, the best thing to do at this point would be to talk to her. Tell her how you're feeling, and she should understand.

Best of luck, keep me posted.
<3 madi

Fillin' ya in

2010-05-29T13:59:00.001-04:00

Just to fill y'all in, here are the posts that I am giving advice to:

okay, I have just one URGENT question. Say that u really like a girl and she wants u to kiss her, but the day that u plan on doing it, everyone happens to be there!! By some strange coincidence, the entire lacrosse team, is watching u and the girl u like talk, as well as making extremely rude remarks!!!!!!! Well, do u think that this is fate's way of saying we shouldn't be together and that we shouldn't be together? Also, at what point in a relationship do u think kissing is okay?

This advice is really helpful, except I WANT to kiss her, I just don't know how... I am in a state of awkwardness with my girlfriend, and I feel that if I don't kiss her soon, she will DEFINITELY break up with me, which is something I don't want! Still confused about what I should do in my relationship...
P.S. i have also been having a MAJOR problem with putting my arm over her largely because of the height difference between us, she told me to lower my elbow, but by doing that, I am touching her waist, is that okay?

<3 madi

Urgent Question #2

2010-05-27T00:10:00.001-04:00

Dear friend,

If you want to kiss her, you will. You just need to wait until the right time. Don't sweat it... if she's truly faithful and into you the way I can tell you care about her, she won't leave you so soon. Again, even if you do want to kiss her, if she's pushing you to do it sooner and you have to take more time, and she is showing signs of leaving because of this, then maybe she isn't dedicated the way she should be and you should rethink this.

Also, about the arm, just put it on her waist. If you had described her as more of a person who didn't want to go too "far" that early in the relationship, I would say otherwise, but if she wants you to kiss her, putting your arm on her waist shouldn't be a problem. In fact, if you do it the right way it can actually be more affectionate than putting your arm on her shoulders.

I hope I helped, and again, keep me posted.

<3 madi

My First Advice Blog!

2010-05-26T18:59:00.001-04:00

Dear friend with urgent question,
Mmhm, that is a dilemma! Well, here's my take on the situation:

Although I do sometimes believe in fate (frankly it depends on the situation) I wouldn't base your whole relationship on one incident. Although this rude lacrosse team seems to have some sort of problem with your relationship, I would assume that you don't even know them very well anyway, so don't let it bother you. If you feel right in the relationship, then you should do what you feel is right. On the other hand, if something seems like it's not going right, or something bigger than the lacrosse team is bothering you about the situation, then that is a reason to talk about it with her. If after talking about it you still don't feel right, then maybe you should think about slowing down, taking a break, or breaking it off.

I also noticed that you said that your girlfriend (if you don't mind titles? Alright, let's stick with "this girl") wants you to kiss her. I think that the real question is are you ready? Because if you are not, by no means should you let yourself be pressured into it. People have different opinions of when in a relationship it is "okay" to kiss someone, but I believe that both people should be comfortable with one another and their relationship first. If she persists when you tell her you're not ready, I think that is a better way to judge whether the relationship is right.

So, friend, keep me informed on how this advice works out... I hope I helped. But do keep me updated, either here or through email, because I would love to try again if this doesn't work.

Hope all goes well!

<3 madi

FRIENDS

2010-05-25T19:55:00.000-04:00

Where would I be right now without my friends?!

I can't even imagine.

Getting through the day wouldn't even be possible without their advice, help, guidance, and love.

There's no way, absolutely NO WAY, that I would be sane right now without them.

Beside the fact that when they are happy, (**SIGH** "melting!" ;) Oh, cute couples) it makes me happier than anything.

Thank you.

<3 madi

Nothing New to Say

2010-05-24T20:34:00.000-04:00

Have you ever had those times when you want to just break down and cry?

When you want to pour out your heart, but there's just nothing new to say?

When you feel like you're just living for the pain?

...

<3 madi

Thinking

2010-05-23T22:42:00.000-04:00

Thinking... just thinking...

Although I value thinking highly, sometimes it gets the best of me.

I over-think things...

Sometimes I just think about things TOO much...

And sometimes thinking about things just makes me plain sad.

Agree?

<3 madi

WARNING: VERY CONTROVERSIAL... AGAIN....

2010-05-23T13:19:00.001-04:00

We have a request for a discussion of abortion! Soooo here we go!

Okay, so again I respect everyone's views. Because I do, in this case, see both sides... however I am indeed pro-choice.

A woman should have control over her body, and if you are impregnated by, let's say, rape, would you want that child to have to live with that? Or that woman having to remember that whenever she looks at the child?

And if that woman is pro-life, than she can also keep the baby. Pro-choice is also, I think, the best way to please everyone.

Because I don't know much on this topic, I can't post much... but I would love to hear everyone's opinions.

Remember that I respect all of you, so please respect me!

<3 madi

Hitchhiker's Guide Quotes

2010-05-22T20:02:00.001-04:00

Some of my favorite quotes so far from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy ... you're in for a few laughs:

"You know," Arthur said, "it's at times like this, when I'm trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, and about to die of asphyxiation in deep space, that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young."
"Why, what did she tell you?"

"I don't know, I didn't listen."

"Yes," said Arthur, "we'd be mad, all things considered, to think this was Southend."

"Well, do you think this is Southend?"

"Oh yes."

"So do I."

"Therefore we must be mad."

"Nice day for it."

"Yes," said a passing maniac.

"Who was that?" asked Arthur.

"Who--the man with five heads and the elderberry bush full of kippers?"

"Yes."

"I don't know. Just someone."

"Ah."

"Ford, you're turning into a penguin. Stop it."

...

Ford waddled around his pond in a furious circle.

"Hey, who are you?" he quacked. "Where are you? What's going on and is there any way of stopping it?"

"Please relax," said the voice pleasantly, like a stewardess in an airliner with only one wing and two engines, one of which is on fire, "you are perfectly safe."

"But that's not the point!" raged Ford. "The point is that I am now a perfectly safe penguin, and my colleague here is rapidly running out of limbs!"

"It's all right, I've got them back now...Admittedly," said Arthur, "they're longer than I usually like them, but..."

All of the amazing ones were taken by other blogs... teehee :) But here's one I just HAVE to put in anyway...

"Ford!" he said, "there's an infinite number of monkeys outside who want to talk to us about this script for Hamlet they've worked out."

These may seem strange, but that just means you must read the book! ;)

Now here you may post your suggestions for things to discuss... Also, you may notice a bit of a change of scenery... yes I have changed my blog template, because I felt that this provides a more interesting place for us to share ideas :-)

<3 madi

SUGGEST!

2010-05-21T16:29:00.000-04:00

Other suggestions for interesting topics of discussion here:

(I would have much to discuss had there been an email... ;) )

<3 madi

....-_-....

2010-05-20T23:00:00.000-04:00

Alrighty, out of my last bit of hope I shall display my email once more:

stagegirl2013@gmail.com

Don't be afraid it can only do goooood!

<3 madi

That One Song

2010-05-20T16:22:00.001-04:00

Don't you just love that one song that defines your life at that very moment?

I listen to those often... and often they cause me pain, but pain is okay... pain hurts of course, but it's part of life.

Often times I turn to the song(s) when there's nothing else to turn to...those and my daydreams :-)

I felt that would be worth sharing. Are there any of those songs for you all out there?

I feel as if I blog almost TOO much... when new Average Teens come to visit they'll have much too much to catch up on!!

<3 madi

WARNING: Very Controversial!

2010-05-20T16:02:00.000-04:00

I have a request from a dear friend to talk about Gay Rights. And so I shall.

I don't see the point of NOT allowing gay marriage. How does it affect those of us who aren't homosexual? Why would you want to keep people from being happy together? If a gay couple gets married, how is it going to make you any less of a person, how is it going to hurt you in any way?

Now, for Christians I can see how it goes against the Bible, as some may say. I respect your faith, however, isn't God supposed to love everyone? Everyone means everyone. That means gays, Jews, and race or color, EVERYONE. So I don't quite see how anyone can go against these rights, though I respect anyone's opinions. I will not judge you for your opinion, because people are all different. But I do believe that it's important to accept everyone in the world.

And that's my story :-) I won't judge anyone for their comments, and I hope you won't judge me for mine and that you will continue to visit and accept my help... however, this IS who I am, and there's no way around it, so if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. If you can express your opinions in a respectful manner, then by all means comment :-)

<3 madi

Daydreams

2010-05-20T08:12:00.000-04:00

Have you ever thought that daydreams are what keep you hoping...what keep you going?

They instill that last bit of hope in you when all else is lost, you know... because anything can happen in a daydream. Whatever you want to happen will, and that will give you the strength to keep going.

I've never really thought about it that way before, so it's a new topic for me to be discussing :-)

Does anyone else feel this way?

-madi

Something Poetic

2010-05-19T21:21:00.000-04:00

Something poetic:

and I know I have no chance

and yet here I am

lying on my couch in my living room

in a lacy dress with my hair all done

and no one to watch me cry.

Isn't that poetic? Interesting how things come to you! :-)

<3madi

Contribute!

2010-05-19T15:58:00.000-04:00

I'm not so sure of anything that interesting to post about... so if anyone has any suggestions on a topic that you would like me to discuss, controversial or otherwise, be my guest! Anything!

I would also have topics if someone would start sending me emails... >.>

stagegirl2013@gmail.com

SEND! :-D ;-)

<3madi

Love....hmm.

2010-05-18T19:46:00.000-04:00

Readers, Friends, Fellow Bloggers,

One of our friends, Thanks For All The Fish42, recently posted a blog about love... it's such an interesting topic to discuss...

So here we go!

Once again I shall bring up our dear friend Elena. She said something about love that I most certainly think describes it:

"Pain, happiness, sadness, more pain, that amazing, tingly feeling inside of you that makes you want to scream from happiness..."

Yes, that most certainly describes it... however, can a person at such a young age, say somewhere in the early to middle teens, feel "love"?

If love is all those feelings, and you've felt all of those feelings, have you experienced love?

Or have you experienced what we call "liking someone"?

What's the difference? Has anyone ever explained that? I mean, I for one believe that someone my age does not know what love is. That you need more experience than some schooling to know what love is. But what is "liking someone" ... is it the same feeling but less intense, or is it just our way of saying that the person doing the liking doesn't know what love is so can't say that they are experiencing it?

Whatever "like" is, it most certainly is a confusing state to be in. I know we all know that :-)

And what about a different kind of love... love for family, or for friends? Is it possible that a person can love family, love friends, love pets, but not love a significant other? And, again, there's a difference... but it's hard to pinpoint it, isn't it? Loving family members... you can't really describe that feeling. It's trust, it's passion, but isn't that involved in relationships too?

Love.... what a controversial, interesting, and CONFUSING topic to discuss.

<3madi

Not Much To Report

2010-05-18T16:36:00.000-04:00

Normal day today... not much to report.

Actually, I was pretty happy and calm for once... and my cake was a big hit!

It was "MOIST" and wonderful... maybe I should make cakes more often!

"Hey, happy Wednesday... here's a cake!"

EVERYONE will love me ;)

I would love to hear about anything new in any of YOUR lives... I have yet to get an email. Go on, don't be afraid! :-P

<3madi

Cake Mishaps

2010-05-17T23:35:00.000-04:00

Here's a nice anecdote for you, it just happened to me as I was baking a birthday cake for one of my commenters/best friends, Thanks For All The Fish42:

So, I was following all the directions, I put in the mix, the water, and the oil. It looked good so far... (this is a vanilla cake, mind you.)

Now I've done all this and I come to the part where I have to add the eggs. Instead of just saying "3 eggs" it says "3 egg whites."

Now, that sounds simple enough... I know how to separate the egg from the egg white, just crack the egg and shift the yolk between the shell halves until all the white has dripped out... a simple baker's trick.

However, I've gotten through 2 of the 3 eggs and I drop a yolk into the mix. Now I, being a perfectionist, HAVE to get this out. I take the spoon and start searching through the mix... the yolk is nowhere to be found.

Now I'm beginning to panic.

What if I don't find it? What will happen to the cake? WHAT IF IT IS RUINED...

Yes, I know, melodramatic...

Anyway, I finally get to my last resort.....

I wash my hands, prepare myself, and dig them in... and what do I come out with? THE YOLK.

I felt so triumphant I wanted to jump up and down and sing... I didn't though because it was 11:30pm.

And so, my cake is now in the oven, and I am happily awaiting its completion so that I can ice it :-)

Now that you know I'm a perfectionist and a complete weirdo, I think I'll go to bed for the night... but I'm happily awaiting both my cake and your emails. :-)

<3madi

Elena, How I Learn From You!

2010-05-17T19:37:00.001-04:00

Friends,

I just wanted to comment on something that Elena, who also happens to be one of my best friends, has brought up.

"Pain. I love it."

Some would find that a strange statement, but I think if you look deep enough you'll find that it's true for many people, one of them being me. Pain may be hard, pain may be, well, painful, but it makes you stronger.

You must learn from your mistakes.

After all, what is life about if not learning as you live?

Elena has taught me something today, as she has taught me things very often:

Pain is both your best friend and your worst enemy. It will make you stronger, and you certainly learn from it, but it also hurts... but that's okay.

FDR said, "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."

I think this applies to pain... we fear pain, we sometimes fear that others will be hurt, but (and this is another thing I've discussed with Elena in the past) sometimes this fear that others will be hurt is simply a stretch of YOU not wanting to be hurt. Think about it... if this certain person is hurt or upset, why else would you fear this happening if it wouldn't hurt YOU?

So is it really you you are thinking of after all?

Do you not want this person to get hurt, or do you not want yourself to hurt because of this person's grief?

I would love to hear everyone's comments about this.

Ohhh!

2010-05-17T19:27:00.000-04:00

Oh, gosh, I just realized something... people can't post anonymous comments!! Hmm... If you go to your profile and change your display name, that is what your comment will show up as. If you don't want to do that, just email me. Here's my email again:

stagegirl2013@gmail.com

Thanks for reading! :-)

<3madi

...Am I Stupid?

2010-05-17T19:10:00.000-04:00

Is feeling just a tad bit stupid...

No one has commented!

Is anyone out there?

...

I'm not sure how to get readers, but I would love to give advice.

It's sort of like your own personal advice blog.

If you don't feel like just putting down all of your problems here for everyone to see, feel free to email me at:

stagegirl2013@gmail.com

and I will dedicate a blog post to your "fake" name... (you know the drill, make up a cool name that goes with your story and I'll call you by it.)

So go on, email/post, and I will officially begin my very own ADVICE BLOG.

<3madi

One of Those Days

2010-05-17T16:20:00.001-04:00

Ever had one of those days where you just feel like you want to cry?

Where just about everything goes wrong?

That was today.

Go ahead and vent... comment if you've ever felt like this before.

Also, a word of wisdom:

Try not to worry about things that you can't help, because it'll only stress you more. Although it may be hard, try to put the extra stress behind you and worry about the things you CAN help. This word of advice comes from a great friend of mine. :-) <3

<3madi

Go For It!

2010-05-16T23:06:00.000-04:00

Hello again,

This is where everyone can post their problems.

I'll be happy to help, and it's very healthy to vent, so go ahead... no one's going to judge you, and I'm only here to help.

Feel free to make me your "safe" ... I don't even know who you are, I'm really the best person for the job ;)

Go for it!

<3madi

Just An Average Teenager

2010-05-16T22:50:00.001-04:00

Hi everyone... I'm just an average teenager, trying to find her place... I don't know who's reading this or what they'll say, but all I'm looking for is a hand to reach out... some advice when times get hard. I'd rather you not give your name, your age, or any information... it's better if I don't know who you are. But everyone is invited.
I'm also great at giving advice, even if I'm not so good at taking it... so anyone can feel free to email me, or post something right here on the blog, and I'll do my best to help you out... because I take great joy in helping others... so please, post some questions, dilemmas, whatever you would like, because I hope we can have a give-and-take relationship here.
<3madi